the flu

I am always complaining about parents that send their kids to school sick, mainly because I catch everything, but also because I am not a nurse and the child is miserable all day long.

Well the flu has been rapidly sweeping through my place of employment. So much so that in the last two weeks I have only had half of my class in attendance on any given day. This was true for everyday but Tuesday, when everyone showed up. Wednesday we were back down to half a class, relapse, I guess. Yes, the flu has hit hard this year.

At 12:40 am Thursday morning after tossing and turning and not being able to get comfortable no matter what I did that horrible feeling came over me, the one that said, “perhaps you can make it to the bathroom if you are lucky.” I was lucky, or unlucky depending on one’s definition. I hugged the porcelain god, not remembering eating anything that I was seeing on its way back up.

Achy was a damn understatement. At 12:42 I logged on to the districts sub system and prayed that my friend was still available to step in for me, thankfully she was.

The porcelain god and had on and off visits through the night, as I cried for help. Of course, I live downstairs and everyone else lives upstairs so no one heard my plea for assistance. I am thinking intercoms for my elder years.

Once my stomach was empty of everything including any acids it might have produced in the last two or three months I put a little ice water in it with as many knock my ass out pills that I could safely take, and repeated this procedure until my daughter came by Thursday afternoon. At this point, she insisted Popsicles and Taco Bell was the cure for the flu, I was thinking more along the lines of 7 Up and Gatorade.

I knew I shouldn’t have eaten the Taco salad, in fact do not eat beans when you are sick, they come out the other end rapidly… the Popsicle was fine, I even talked my son into the 7 up and the Gatorade, which was wonderful for my Friday intake.

This morning I was talking to my dear friend about the fact that my two youngest children would only help me if I gave them something. For my son it was money, for my daughter it was a few “mother’s little helpers”… my friend was applaud that they would charge me. She has known my children since they were 9 or 10 and used to watch the youngest ones for me after school. She had a few choice words for them and then sent me a cartoon to put up on my bedroom door.

She told me to start charging them for favors… this will happen from now on… little shits.

Well this is day three of the flu and I am actually starting to feel closer to human. I do not know how long this is supposed to last, but I am hoping to be back on my feet and out and about by Monday… work and all…